Deadeye R
by Erithemaeus
Summary: The long-awaited rework is here. While Hikigaya Hachiman's life has slowly been trickling down a spiral ever since entering Kunugigaoka, saving the world might be the ticket he needs to get things back on track. Or perhaps drive him deeper into a depth that he cannot fathom.
1. Chapter 1-1

**Deadeye**

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Chapter (1.1) - A Sense of Space is Mandatory, it Seems

* * *

The concept of mandatory education is a flawed execution in order to obtain relevant knowledge. Such a thing might have worked for the past few centuries, but with the prevalence of the Internet interconnecting different spheres of thought and science, the need for mandatory schooling all but disappears due to the ease of which one could acquire information from the net itself.

Of course, one could rebut my point by saying that going to school is important for cultivating social skills relevant for getting a job and other important life skills, but! I desire to be a househusband! One does not require social skills when the rest of the time spent at my 'job' consists of taking care of the house and kids!

Also, important life skills? School does not teach you how to file taxes! School does not show you the proper way to invest in stocks and the proper way of simulating a workspace! The simple fact that I do not know such things by this point in time is proof of the fact that schools mishandle the way to appropriate knowledge!

Therefore, this is why I find mandatory education into nothing more than a flawed attempt to pass on knowledge to future human beings. While it _does _pass on knowledge as its primary purpose, the knowledge itself is useless in today's current society. An admirable effort, but being stuck in the same schooling model for the past few centuries isn't doing you any favors. 2/10.

An aside as well.

School does not teach you how to react to an alien being suddenly declaring itself as the teacher for your homeroom class. Nor does it teach you the proper way to react when the country's own Department of Defense is sponsoring us to kill said alien being. Also, way to put on the pressure when both say that we need to kill said alien being within the year lest the entire earth explodes. I mean, someone should at least have done something, right? It was just one being. It wasn't as if it has some countermeasures to—

Oh.

It can move at Mach 20.

...

This is hopeless. And the government bets its hopes on a class of outcasts and failures to accomplish what the entire world couldn't do? Alright, talk about additional pressure. Not that I didn't need any more.

_"For your two years of probation after the incident, I would be transferring you to the E-Class. Do you have any problem with that?"_

_"None, Principal."_

I felt my shoulder being nudged to the side. My gaze turns towards Takebayashi, the otaku lowering his voice to a whisper while leaning his body towards me. Personal space. While sleazy otaku like you don't need it, I sure as hell do. "Ne, Hikigaya, this feels something straight out of a manga, doesn't it?"

"Yeah." I reply, turning back towards my book. A few seconds pass while under the class's ruckus, and I find myself gazing over the edge of my book to stare at said alien being. Yellow skin, beady eyes, wide smile. That expression might be enough to haunt my nightmares for quite some time. Unless that was the alien's point, of course. In which case, more glory to it. Also, much curses. That's my dreams you're haunting, damn it!

... Thank whatever's up there that the alien's wearing clothes, at least. I do _not _want that image in my mind and oh god please make it stop I need brain bleach— "Hikigaya, you alright?"

I owlishly blink, turning my gaze toward's Takebayashi's own. Not that I could actually see his eyes however, since his glasses were glinting off some kind of light. I take it back. You can only throw yourself off a cliff after you teach me that technique, you otaku. "Uh, yeah. Just... spaced out for a few minutes there."

"Ah. Still in shock, eh?" I narrow my eyes at him, my lips morphing into a scowl.

"Who _wouldn't _be?" I snap back, rubbing my temples to prepare for the incoming migraine. Still, I didn't bother giving Takebayashi a reply after that, instead focusing back onto the topic at hand. Or at the very least, tentacle-like things with opposable thumb-like appendages. I... don't even know where to start with that. How is this thing a teacher again, with tentacles like that? There's girls in here, y'know? One wrong move and he might as well turn himself to the police out of shame. Or not. The alien could literally get away from anything with that Mach 20 speed.

Ugh, focus. Not on the tenta- _appendages_ themselves, but whatever the alien being's talking about. "Therefore, I do believe that some introductions are in order! Let's start with Kataoka-san, shall we?"

Crap. Introductions. Never really good with those, and I surmise that I'm never going to be good with them for the entirety of my life. After all, I'm planning to be a househusband in the future. There wasn't really enough people to introduce yourself with, since in-laws and my wife's co-workers never really count. Or at the very least, I hope that it shouldn't be. Not that I'm perfectly sure that I'd get a wife in the first place, but at the very least _some _optimism is required. Else I'd just be a househusband without a wife. One of the most useless jobs ever.

"Psst! Hikigaya! Oi!" I ignored Takebayashi's voice, mostly for my own sanity than anything else. More than likely, he'd bug me with something otaku-related, and I'm not sure that I'd want to go down that rabbit hole. Piping down any and all sorts of chuunibyou was enough. I didn't need to keep additional track of my addiction to figurines and posters, lest I be overswamped with work. Literally the one thing that I'm trying to avoid once I have been opened to the plights of the Japanese workplace.

Alright, so it was more or less running away from the problem as compared to actually taking steps to solve it, but to be fair not that I can do anything by myself—

"Hikigaya-kun!"

—I choked on whatever scream I was supposed to release, immediately snapping out of my thoughts while my eyes lock onto beady blank ones instead. So uh, should've paid attention to my surroundings. I can see those tentac- _appendages_ of the alien swirling around me, snapping those finger-like things that they have at the ends. This is how I'm going to die, isn't it? Death by tentacled alien monster. A bad way to go all things considered, considering that I'm a guy for one, and whatever excuses this alien monster turned teacher would have, he's certainly going to jail for sexual harassment. At the very least, if they had some basic sense of human decency. Once again however, I'm not sure if it applies to someone like this alien thing.

"While having a vivid imagination is good for someone of your age, we'd still like to hear you introduce yourself to the class, Hikigaya-kun."

... Ah. So it was that. Not that I thought about anything else, really. I mean, I don't judge people or... _things_, based on their appearances, so I'm weirdly tolerant of this kind of stuff. I think. Probably. It's hard to tell just by looking at my face and ignoring my eyes. I should probably introduce myself instead of just babbling on. Who knows what this alien being would do.

"Hikigaya Hachiman. Transferred to the E class for the rest of the year. Specialty is Japanese Literature. Nice to meet you."

Having said my piece, I sat back down and managed to barely go through a panic attack. Most of the E class were already whispering about my rotten luck, while others were muttering about my former position in the C class. All expected, all accounted for. Which was good. I didn't like talking about this for far longer than necessary. At the very least, the alien thing with yellow tentacl– _appendages _was already slithering along towards the person behind me, a delinquent-type named Yoshida or something like that. He also had eyes like mine, if you know, they were just a little bit better.

"Ne, Hikigaya..."

I huffed, trying to bore a hole through my pocketbook as Takebayashi began prattling once more. This time was a fluke, I promise. Nothing more than my otaku-cover prattling on about some kind of inane nonsense about a galge that conquered 108 little sisters. Truly, a disgusting person with no redeeming qualities to speak of.

A true man would only be satisfied with one. Like Komachi, for example. Of course, it should come with a caveat that both parties are unrelated by blood, lest it becomes nothing more than sickening, disgusting incest.

... I should just stop burying a deeper grave for myself.

* * *

[–|–]

* * *

Transferring to the E class is commonly seen as a mark of shame, here in Kunugigaoka Junior High School. I can't help but agree with the opinion. After all, they are held up as the shining beacon of what _not _to do while studying in school, featured and made as laughingstock for each and every single school assembly that I have been to since my transfer into this school about... a year ago. It didn't take me long to know the power structure in this school, and I can't help but feel sorry for the rest of them.

The rest of the student body, that is. Not the E class themselves.

Day in and day out they are forced to memorize formula after formula, example after example, and factoid after factoid in order to gain an edge ahead of their studies, but it does not truly nurture the life skills that one needs to survive in the wild jungle that is reality. Merely remembering a quote from the second stanza of a particular sonnet does not teach you how to argue for a better job position. Knowing the perfect way to cook a spaghetti bologna isn't going to help someone make meals in accordance to their purchasing power. Knowing the myriad forms of government does not help in building connections to other political figures in the current climate. Thus, all subjects that this school teaches is undoubtedly worthless.

See my thoughts on the current system of education for that matter.

Additionally, the values that Kunugigaoka Junior High _does _instill in its students are pretty idiotic, and would most undoubtedly be useful for someone living half a century ago. Instilling the drive to work hard by the means of the existence of the E class does strive to make the rest of the student body work disturbingly long hours into the night, but it uses the irrational fear of what the E class stands for in order to enforce a tight grip upon the students' mentality.

This should not be the case. The hatred and forced isolation of the E class should be moved to a more logical approach, to show the rest of the student body that they are there due to the individual flaws that they had allowed to fester instead of grouping the whole E class itself into these stereotypes. That the E class should be the probation period for striving to fail the school's values – a last chance to ingratiate themselves once more into the school's vision under the looming threat of expulsion.

Which is the main reason as to why I am here in the first place. Damn my chatty mouth.

"So, Hikigaya eh?"

"Transferred from the main campus to here..."

"... Kind of pathetic, don't ya' think?"

Indeed. The E class should be a mark of shame for failing to live up to the principal's vision. But to see this kind of behavior from someone who is in the E class itself is just... disappointing.

"Hypocrites, the lot of you seem to be."

I jump, the hand slamming next to my ear too close for comfort. My breath quickens. A sharp breath escapes my throat, and my blood begins to pound against my skull. A quick glance down reveals that whoever this Terasaka is, he seems to be confident enough to keep his lower half unguarded. I can use that.

"Heh, you're just like the others. All talk and no game... no wonder you got yourself punted here. You can't get back to where you were, Hikigaya." Don't lean in. For the love of whatever's up there, don't lean in...

Terasaka ignores my warning, and leans even closer whilst meeting my gaze. "You know what that means? It means you're in _my _territory now— Ghk?!"

A scream echoes through the air. Terasaka's, that is. He crumples to the rotten floorboards as I draw back my knee, hyperventilating and eyes switching to and fro his two lackeys. They take a step back, most likely due to meeting my gaze, and I sprint off while they were distracted towards somewhere... anywhere far from here.

I shudder whilst gripping my arms a few moments later, looking out onto a badly-maintained field and trying to tuck myself into a ball. The concrete steps were as cold as my hands, but luckily they were solid enough to hold my weight as I let the jitters pass through. One moment passes. Two moments pass. I silence a scream when the third moment passes by biting the sleeve of my cardigan and holding it tight.

Never again. Never again. Never again...

_"Can't I... Can't I study with Shu for this?"_

_"He already finished that topic by noon. I suggest you finish the assessment test soon Hachiman-kun, lest you're going to spend the night reviewing your mistakes. Do you have any problem with that?" _

_"N-No."_

Never again.

"Hikigaya-kun." I freeze, finding that lilt to be eerily familiar, and I slowly turn my gaze to the field to find myself staring into the beady eyes of our new 'teacher'. The airsoft gun I have in my cardigan grows heavier, and I slowly take it out and point it towards the alien thing. "H-Hikigaya-kun, put the gun down, and let's talk, yeah? You can't just hold the next class hostage if you don't like it!"

Was that what it looked like from the outside? Yes it did. Math before Japanese Literature. So I sucked at Math. Not that it was any more obvious, but it wasn't what I was actually here for. Might as well go along with the ride and see where this goes. At the very least, my shaking hands were more or less calm.

"Move one step and I'll put a bullet into you."

The alien thing had the gall to click its nonexistent tongue and waggle an opposable appendage at me. "Tsk, tsk, tsk Hikigaya-kun. I can move at Mach 20. There is no way that you can fire that airsoft gun fast enough to hit me, considering that it doesn't even approach a fraction of the speed of sound itseeEEeEEE–?!"

My finger kept on pulling the trigger, the pellets flickering out of sight just before they connected with the alien being and finding them right next to me. Short puffs of air reigned around the alien thing as he flickered in place at speeds of Mach 20, and I soon found myself without bullets as the short puffs of pressurized carbon dioxide were all that was heard in the clearing. Even still, I kept on firing.

"May I?" The alien thing asked, all the way back as to where it was standing, the same unsettling grin on its face. I kept a neutral expression while I nodded, all but throwing the airsoft gun towards the alien thing. It caught the replica with unerring ease, flickering towards the side entrance of the satellite campus with the BB pellets held in a bouquet of tissue paper, and I could _feel _the smugness oozing from its grin.

"You're assassination's a failure, Hikigaya-kun!" It said, the sing-song voice more than likely responsible for the twitch in my brow. Before it destroyed the Earth, how about it taught me how to do that flash-step like thing instead? At the very least, it can say that it had a worthy disciple or something like that. "Come in, or I'll flag you late for the next class!"

I grumble and follow the show thing, keeping my gaze locked on the airsoft gun to distract myself from the alien thing's opposable tenta– _appendages. _At the very least, the jitter's gone, and I can finally take a fresh breath that didn't involve blood pounding against my temple.

Something akin to a small smile forms on my lips.

**AN: Merry Christmas (on my country, at the very least)! On the 25th of December, a year before the second decade past the second millennium, a story is reborn!**

**Though seriously, sorry I kept you all waiting. It (the rewrite) was supposed to take just a few months, and I expected it to be done by somewhere around... April, May? Somewhere along those times.**

**Alas, college happened. Me, social anxiety, and new places don't mix. Spent my first semester trying to get myself accustomed to everything, and I found myself swamped in requirements. Joy. Not to mention that I had to rewrite the storyboard (or at the very least, major events that coincides with the story) a few times that I can write without issue (looking at thou Zenno-sama, you adorable creature that eats up my free time, you are).**

**So, here's the result. Changing the format to something like a serial to motivate me into continuing on writing it, instead of just dividing chapters by plot point division. Experiments on a few fics with this style to see if it worked, and I must say that I am surprised with the results. Though the greatest factor is the word count being reduced from 3k to 1.5~2.5k. Allows me to write at a more casual pace, which is noice.**

**Anyways, story! As you might notice, I tried injecting something called 'subtlety' into the fic. Time would tell if it works or not. Until then, I'll await your response to this. I won't cry if anyone bashes this, really.**

**... I really won't.**

**Anyways, thank you o' wonderful friends of mine that wouldn't stop me bugging about this fic. You are far more important than you might think. The alarms have nothing to do with this whatsoever.**

**In any case, this is Erithemaeus, signing out. Hope you guys have a lovely Christmas and enjoy the rewrite! **

**PS: Oh god the formatting is terrible on mobile. I swear I'll edit this the first time that I get on a PC.**

**Edit: Finally had my hands on a PC. Edits away!**


	2. Chapter 1-2

**Deadeye**

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Chapter (1.2) - A Sense of Space is Mandatory, it Seems

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There must be some kind of reason for this. Maybe this was my punishment for threatening that alien earlier. If so, then it would establish that this alien is absurdly petty. Couldn't the idiot just grab the gun away from me and go off all giggling or something? The alien can move at Mach 20. They most certainly could. Which meant that it was just being petty.

If the alien wanted to test my patience, then it was doing a fine job.

"Don't worry, once you submit that haiku, then you're free to go home for the day! Just remember to frame it around tentacles, alright?"

Calm. I must stay calm. Only by staying calm would I be able to get through this period without much issue. All I need to do is compose a haiku using tentacles. How hard can it be? It shouldn't be that difficult. I'm already finished.

_Tentacles awaken/_

_inside my stomach/_

_No takoyaki._

...

No. As much as I want the day to be over and for me to retire to my apartment, I still have my pride. I won't submit this filth. Rewrite, rewrite. Cross out the lines and start another one. Not that I can do it that easily, since it's brushwork.

Huh. I just remembered that I _sucked _at this. Why couldn't it be just pen and paper? Did the alien bastard know this already and restricted the writing material to brush and ink just to spite me even further? It didn't really give us a new syllabus, so I assumed that we were still on track with the old one. Or at least, whatever's left if it now that this damn alien being became our 'teacher'.

And I clearly remember that we weren't supposed to be enhancing our calligraphy just after discussing the works before the Warring States era.

My eyes glance towards the alien thing, finding it humming along to whatever kind of music that it listens to while it's skin slowly turns into a vivid pink. Alright, so it's probably a mood ring given tentacl– _appendages _as well. A mood ring with appendages that happens to travel around Mach 20 and could obliterate a large part of the moon.

And I just heard it snicker.

Oh, it was spiteful, alright... I wanted nothing more than to shoot the damn thing, but it would just dodge everything and force me to pick up the mess. Not to mention lecturing me on the disruption of classes, yada-yada. Too much effort and risk to actually take at this moment.

Nothing more to do than just follow orders, then. Starting with making a new haiku. But what to base, what to base... Lovecraft? Lovecraft. Or at the very least, the mythos.

_Tentacles awaken/_

_Cthonic depths rise/_

_Madness sears all ey—_

"Sensei, I'm done."

"Oh? Good job, Nagisa-kun." The alien thing replies, even as my eyes narrow at the unnatural sight. Even from here, I can see the fact that he hadn't written anything down on his paper. Of course, my eyes then strolled over to the rubber knife he tightly held behind him. It wasn't going to work. Even if the alien thing in front seemed a little bit more relaxed than normal, it still wasn't going to work. The guy can move at Mach 20. No matter how fast you can be, the first strike is always going to miss. The class learned it the hard way for the past week that the alien had been 'teaching' us.

So, there was a catch. My eyes strained even further, catching sight of his blue hair (irrelevant now, but now that I think about it, a large amount of people here have their hair dyed) and taking in the rest of his figure. For observation purposes of course. He didn't look like my type.

Besides, he's a guy.

Anyway, I caught a bulge by the base of his neck. It wasn't an Adam's apple since he didn't have his growth spurt yet. And Nagisa couldn't have developed a goiter within the span of a single day. My eyes narrowed into slits, trying to figure out what was off, and I zeroed in on a particular piece of material the moment an errant breeze ruffled his collar.

Metal. I didn't have to see the rest of the contraption. The pineapple-like design was enough.

Blood pounded in my ears, my breath caught in time as I lurch forward and tackle my desk into a makeshift barrier. Dull pain spreads through my shoulder and hip as I brace for impact, spying a glance at the rapidly paling expressions of the rest of the class. No doubt that they saw it too. A moment too late, however. Even I couldn't do anything else than to bark out a single word and huddle against a makeshift blast shield.

"GRENADE—!"

_B̷̨A̧͘͟Ǹ̶͘͜G͏͢!̶̴̛̀͞_

A scream rises up from everywhere as my ears ring, the sound pounding against my skull. Hands place themselves over my ears to no effect, and tears flow out of my eyes in reflex.

Loud. So loud. Loud enough that my ears still rang even though I covered my ears. I gritted my teeth, but it seemed like it wasn't enough to make me feel any better. At the very least... I was unharmed. Disregarding the painful ringing in my ears, I didn't have a scratch.

The same couldn't be said for Nagisa, however...

"Finally! That idiotic octopus is dead!"

"Terasaka, just what the _hell _did you do?!"

Propping a hand against the lip of my desk (not the ringing was going away any time soon), I slowly pulled myself off the floor and turned to survey my surroundings. Takebayashi was fine, and it seemed like he was stuck behind a desk-shield as well. The rest of the class seemed to be looking at the blast site with horror, ringing ears, and/or both. I couldn't blame them, really. My ears were still ringing, and the others were smacking their temples to get rid of the sound... to no avail. The rest of the gazes were focused at the front, and the whiff of smoke made my blood freeze.

My eyes turn towards ground zero, finding nothing more than a black smear on the wood. Ash. Flash burning or whatever. No doubt that Nagisa was either dead, or grievously injured. All because of a grenade primed around his neck. And the ones responsible...

"At that range, with a BB grenade? That octopus is dead!"

... Were just bragging about their recent homicide to the rest of the class.

Bile rose up my throat. I don't know whether or not to feel disgusted or enraged. Blood began to pound against my ears, my breath quickening by the second, and shivers began going through my body while I searched for the means to get out. I need _space. _To think. To get away. I don't need any other reason. Someone was just blown up in front of me.

I need space, and I need it _now_.

But the breath that came after froze me in my tracks. The urge to run dissipated, rendered into smithereens by the sound of the sheer _menace _that suddenly spread throughout the entire room. Like centipedes crawling down your skin, rolling over you with their chitinous squeaks and creaks. I could do nothing and hope that it goes away. Just like always, I could only hope.

**"Terasaka. Yoshida. Muramatsu. So the lot of you are the ringleaders, eh?"**

To their effort, they snapped out of their shock quickly, blaming Nagisa for their sheer incompetence. It didn't work. But props for the effort nonetheless. Everyone in the class got a blast of wind in turn, and the tension eased ever-so slightly as the stifling atmosphere disappeared for the moment. Everyone was still rooted in place, however. Anyone who can move in earlier circumstances were undoubtedly _in_human.

Terasaka. Wasn't he the idiot that didn't expect a knee to the crotch earlier? He was. So that stunt wasn't just some sort of intimidation, but a 'recruitment' as well. Nagisa wasn't as lucky as me in that regard, considering that he...

Regardless, it was nothing more than chance that allowed me to avoid being turned into a blackened smear. If I had done anything else earlier, it would've been me marching down that aisle towards my death. What did it feel like, carrying a primed grenade by your neck like some sort of twisted accessory? If it was me in Nagisa's case, would I have done the same?

No. Most definitely not. What I would've done was to—

—_Plop._

I blink, staring at the nameplate of my house. Not the apartment that my uncle had 'gifted' me somewhere around this area, but the one that I had in Chiba. Where I lived before two years ago. A time that I left behind to try and start anew in Kunugigaoka.

The threat was clear. I didn't need the ringing in my ears to tell what that monster in yellow skin was trying to tell me. Whatever that guy from the government prattled to the rest of us the moment that monster was introduced to the class, I still remembered the one clause that they had over the alien monster.

It wouldn't hurt any one of us.

But such a thing didn't apply to our families. To _Komachi_.

...

Ah. Now this was more familiar territory.

This sounded something like the principal would do.

* * *

[–|–]

* * *

I didn't know when I found myself puking at the back of the satellite campus, but I couldn't care less. The acrid smell of my vomit and the earthy smell of everything else didn't mix, and it took everything I had to keep myself together and not retch on the grounds for the nth time. That... that _monster _was threatening Komachi. My sister's under the sight of that monster.

Of that teacher.

Blood pounds in my ears, my breath quickening into shallow pants. My eyes narrow into slits, and the shivers that racked my shoulders slowly gave way to a single, calm, breath. I closed my eyes for a single second, and I open them once more to set my sights on a dead man. Alien. Monster-thing. Teacher.

"Hikigaya."

I stop in my tracks, meeting gazes with the guy from the government. A part of me was surprised that he returned my stare, but maybe it was a trait shared with all people from the government. You're supposed to work with people from all classes of life after all, and it certainly includes someone with eyes like mine. Hopefully.

"You should be in class right now." The government guy said, and I can't help but feel chastised at the fact that I didn't even know his name. I knew that he had a 'K' somwehere, along with a pretty long name, but I still can't get a bead on it. Karasuba? Konoma? Yup, can't remember it.

"My name's Karasuma, if you don't mind me telling you."

No I don't. I'd like to thank you instead. "Understood, Karasuba-san."

"That's not it at all." He muttered something under his breath, looking thoroughly distracted by the sound of his own voice. I tried to take a step back towards the school, only for Karasuba to focus on me instantly.

Alright, no sneaking past you, then. I can live with that.

"I'll ask once more as to what you're doing here." He said, gripping the black folder that he brought with him and staring at me dead-on. If I was looking for proof that he wasn't uncomfortable with my eyes, this was it. "You're supposed to have class, Hikigaya. What are you doing here?"

I debated telling him about what transpired earlier, and immediately came to an easy conclusion. He was helping us kill that alien monster after all, so it was obvious on which side he would be taking. I took a single breath, glanced to the side, and let a little bit of the shudder that I've been holding back.

"Panic attack." I breathed out, glancing down with a scowl. Rarely do I ever use this for a constructive gain, so I had to make it work. Or at the very least, natural enough to fool Karasuba. I have no delusions on which side he is on, and it is most definitely not mine.

Not when I'm sure that the principal tampered my files to make sure that I went straight to the E class.

"Haphephobia. Or at the very least, something close to it." I muttered under a whisper, gently once and pushing my hands into my pockets. "Fight-or-flight response triggered when someone intrudes on my personal space without permission... or something close to that, if I remember what the doctor said."

Quaint, isn't it? That the alien monster that threatened Komachi out of all people was more trustworthy than me. I can already see the principal's work already, by the way that Karasuba's brows furrowed into a frown.

"I wasn't told of this."

"Of course you weren't." I only got it a year ago, after all. And it wasn't as if it was going to be recorded in my student files. That would just be stupid, and would cause a scandal that a lot of different parties would be hard-pressed to deal with.

Not that I could subtly push things in that direction. Or to take a closer look at my records, at the very least.

"I'm a bit calmer now." I spoke up, a statement full of nothing but the truth. "I can go back to class, if you like."

"Go on, then." Karasuba nodded, nodding once and moving from his spot with a practiced gait. "I'll be escorting you back to class, if you don't mind. Would that be alright with you?"

Not that I was even planning on sneaking off in the first place. "It's fine, Karasuba-san."

"Like I told you earlier, it's Karasu_ma__, _not Karasuba." He replied back, an annoyed hint in his tone that I would be milking for the rest of my stay here. Nevertheless, he did what he was supposed to do and ushered me back to class amidst a sea of confused expressions and gawking stares. As if they hadn't known that I've been gone in the first place.

And it seemed as if the alien monster (what the hell the class doing, naming the thing threatening our families and the entire world?) hadn't noticed my absence as well, given the blank expression on its face. That... was something that I can exploit in the future.

But for the moment, a glare at the alien monster was enough to keep me mollified for the sake of my revenge. It had screwed up the moment it threatened my family. Threatened Komachi.

First things first however, was to rewrite my budding haiku once more. This time, I managed to finish it with passable results, strolling by the alien monster's desk and firmly submitting my entry on the growing pile. After that, it was a bit of a walk back to my apartment to plan.

One way or another, that monster is going to fall.

* * *

[–|–]

* * *

_Revenge burns below/_

_All eyes of monsters and men/_

_Where t__entacles fall. _


	3. Chapter 1-3

**Deadeye**

* * *

Chapter (1.3) - A Sense of Space is Mandatory, it Seems

* * *

The task that I have... tasked myself into doing is no small feat. Killing was most definitely a serious crime, but coupled with the fact that the victim was an alien, threatened Komachi, and was a dead man wanted by the government, it was definitely easier in my conscience to eliminate that monster. Whatever it was, it would be getting its just desserts.

Which is why I need information. I'd bide my time for the moment, making the most of the ironclad rule, then I'd strike once I know almost all of its weaknesses. Even if the monster can move at Mach 20, it definitely needs to get that energy from somewhere.

But shaved ice from the North Pole is just pushing it too far. Is it just lording over its Mach 20 speed over the class? If it is, then it's more petty than I thought. And if the alien monster feels pettiness, then it must have other emotions as well, if the changing expressions on its face were by any indication.

That's already a weakness, wasn't it? A capability to have emotions...

"Hikigaya, aren't you going to join us?"

My eyes bored into Isogai's own, causing him to hitch a breath and the smile on his face to become more strained. Yeah. That was the effect they I've been looking for. I thought that my glare had lost its touch since it didn't affect that guy from the government... What's his name again? Kazuma? Kajima.

Anyways, best I reply first before going off into tangents. Isogai's... not a bad person to be around, and deserves some courtesy from yours truly. Like replying to his questions, for example.

"Nah, it's fine. I'm just going to check up on the tulips." I replied, causing Isogai to shrug and turn back towards his posse. With a wave of a hand, I made my way back to the campus, hopefully making sure that I looked cool enough to warrant any further embarrassment. Not that I needed much anyway, since I saw Terasaka and his lackeys middling around the forest doing who knows what. I could still vividly remember ramming a knee into his manhood.

Man, I must've looked so cool.

I mean, not by much, but if you ignore the eyes, then yeah. I definitely looked cool.

Anyways, the tulips. Part of our curriculum in Home Ec was to know how to grow small patches of plants if you wanted some extra oomph in your home. Well that, and it's apparently very useful to grow your own herbs to use in your own cooking. That was still quite a few months off, but it stoked my house husband tendencies like a particularly dry tinder to a flame.

For the moment however, we've been tasked to grow tulips by the alien monster. Something about it being close enough to growing herbs and the like, but cheap enough to buy wholesale. I was about to sympathize with the Dutch, then I remembered that they tried to specialize in a time wherein the Industrial Revolution was in great effect. It was obvious that anyone with their heads screwed on straight would try to underprice the flower market to drive them out of business. Well that, and procuring a sample and mass producing it on a much wider scale.

The class's task was simple, really. Each one has to grow at least five tulip flowers by summer, where it'll be graded as a footnote alongside other, more time conducive skills like cooking and sewing. All in all a waste of time, but I couldn't help but get attached to my particular patch of tulips.

Or at the very least, the ones that grew. The others I chucked back into the sack and called it a day.

Anyway, six proud tulips stood tall in my patch, the morning dew long gone as I set about watering them for the day. We that and Takebayashi's tulips too, since the idiot couldn't take care of plants even with a gun to his head. Idiot.

Moments pass as I retrieve the watering can from the shed and filled it with water, humming a little tune while making by way back to my patch of tulips. Everything was right in the world. I am exuding house husband levels over 9000. Just ignore the eyes, and I can take care of the cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the kids. Indeed, I have reached house husband nirvana.

Of course, it was at that time the universe decided I was having too much fun, and decided to give me a slap to the face.

It's gone. The tulips... My tulips... all gone. Months of work lost. All that I have to go on is the fact that the ground around the tulips looked like they were dug up, roots and all.

Unforgivable. The moment that I find out who did this, I am going to— "And don't you _dare _use your Mach 20 to plant those buds! Go at normal speed, and plant them _delicately_, you hear!? We spent _months _working on those tulips, so you better give it the respect and care that they deserve!"

"Y-Yes, ma'am!"

I stared at the other plots lining the satellite campus. Yes, that was indeed the alien monster currently planting tulip buds. That was indeed Kataoka scolding the bastard for ruining our tulips. A mixture of rage and anger simmered to the surface, and the alien bastard froze to turn towards me. Towards my eyes, and the sheer apathy within them to mask the rage roiling inside.

The alien monster screeched, turning back towards his plot with haste, only for him to be reprimanded once more by Kataoka. There was nothing more for me to do. Whatever punishment or revenge that I might be able to accomplish would pale in comparison to whatever Kataoka had cooked up.

...

... Sulking it is, then.

* * *

[––]

* * *

"Hikigaya..."

I glance up from my cloud of gloom to witness the guy from the government staring at me. Once more, he didn't flinch nor draw away, and I can't help but grumble at the unfairness of life once more. Why is he the only one who isn't creeped out by my eyes? Did he see even creepier things before? If so, then I'm glad. There's still hope left for me.

Or not. He's a man in black, for goodness's sake. Of _course _he's seen some weird stuff. Yellow-skinned alien monster that could move at Mach 20 notwithstanding.

Then again, _no one _could see that coming.

"Yes, Kazuma-san?"

"Like I said before, my name's Karasuma..." He trailed off, a twitch in his brow as he glanced around him and sat down quite a few paces next to me. At very least, Karasuba-san seems to respect boundaries.

And of course I was joking when I greeted him as Kazuma-san. It was nothing more than a harmless joke, but it seemed that he was more than annoyed by it. Finally, someone else I can needle aside from Shu and that alien monster. Everyone in the class knows that his name is Karasuba, after all.

"So, why are you skipping class today?"

"I'm not skipping." I whined, because it most definitely sounded like whining. I was tempted to end myself out of sheer embarrassment by playing along, but sometimes sacrifices had to be made. "I'm just... uh, contemplating a few things."

As expected, Karasuba didn't buy it, narrowing his eyes at me. "Really."

Cover established. I huffed and tucked myself further into a ball. "Fine, I'm sulking." I grunted, "That alien idiot ripped out all of the tulips that we've been growing for the past few months. Naturally, it included mine."

"And you're hung up over a bunch of flowers?"

My brow twitched, a scowl forming on my face. "I worked hard to get those buds forming." I grumbled. "Took care of them everyday to make sure that they get where they are now, but that alien bastard just ripped off all of my progress over the past few months. I've already got two of them blooming."

"... I see." It was obvious that he didn't. What if _he _tried growing something by his own hand only for some idiot to ruin everything? "So, you're just going to ignore the rest of your classmates over there?"

The disbelief in his tone forced me to glance towards the rest of the class, currently crowding around the tied-up alien monster and waving around their rubber knives like pitchforks. I can't help but blink at the sight once more, looking something like a medieval witch hunt, and grumble at the missed opportunity. So much for sulking by myself, damn it.

"You might want to join in as well." Karasuba states, causing me to glare at him for even suggesting such a thing. I'd rather be here than in the thick of things, thank you very much. Too many people in one space for me to even think about taking a step towards that direction. At the very least, it seemed like Karasuba realized his mistake, and slowly stood up from his spot.

"... My apologies. I should've known that you wouldn't want that." He spoke, only getting a non-committal grunt from me in reply. "Very well. I'll keep your haphephobia in mind when I'll be teaching your class tomorrow. I do hope that you would be able to overcome it by the time that we get started with sparring."

Once more, I blinked. This time, it came with a tinge of pleasant surprise.

"You're teaching us?"

"PE, yes, but that's it." Karasuba replied with a nod, much to my draining enthusiasm. The one subject that I wanted to do good at was one of my worst ones yet. Goddamn it. "Your current teacher is... much more suited to teaching other subjects for the meantime until we can find another."

"I... can't deny that." I gritted out with a blank expression on my face. I really can't. Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping alien monster it might be, it is nonetheless very, _very _intelligent. No doubt that he wouldn't have gotten this far without some semblance of one, but couple it with a speed that not most individuals could match, and you have all but the perfect individual. An ultimate life-form.

Therefore, what reason does it have for teaching a class of failures, when it could've done anything else?

Nevertheless, I shake my head. Questions later, replying to government figure first. I can spy on that alien monster for information later when I'm not on a mental deadline to reply to conversations. Thus, I said my piece while bowing forward to meet the ground's gaze.

"Then, we'll be in your care, Kazuma-san."

"For the last time, my name's _Karasuma_." He grumbled, trudging off to the campus to attend to whatever duties he had. I hid a smile, getting up from my spot a moment later and trudging back towards the throng of individuals that seemed a lot more spread out than before.

No one seemed to indicate my arrival, which was a bit disheartening and hopeful at the same time. Overall, it worked in my favor, more often than not.

"And just for that, I'll be doubling all of your homework for the day!"

I snarled, drawing my airsoft gun from my cardigan and unloading the entire clip into the Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, taskmaster of an alien monster. Of course, it barely fazed the monster, shrieking all the while even as I ran out of ammo and the soft puffs of carbon dioxide filtered through the silent air. The monster regained its footing on top of the roof and turned towards me in anger, if its red skin color was by any indication.

"Hikigaya-kun! Just for that stunt, I'll be rewarding you with _thrice _the homework!"

Negotiations began until the alien monster eventually settled on twice the amount of original homework.

* * *

**AN: Thanks for all the feedback, guys! Glad to see that this rework's doing pretty well, all things considered.****Moving on to the feedback that I got from you guys, yes Hachiman does have the same condition as Sam Porter Bridges, although not quite. Like he said in his conversation with Karasuma, haphephobia is the best way to describe his condition. In truth, Hachiman only freaks out if he gets touched by someone he didn't give express permission to, as opposed to freaking out when anyone touches him if he has haphephobia. It's just a convenient term for him to describe such a thing, is all. Although yes, he does have a reason as to why he has it. Pretty sure I wrote down a pretty good hint on the origins of his condition.**

**Plus**** yeah, you can totally see Stealth Hikki in action already. You know he's going to monopolize it. You know that Korosensei's going to come up with countermeasures against it. You know that anyone wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. Just saying.**

**But**** for those of you worrying, Hachiman's still going to be a badass along with the rest of the E class. He's just going to take some... 'creative' ways to do it, is all, considering that he doesn't speak to almost anyone in the class. Let's just say that his phobia and Stealth Hikki are working hand in hand to guide him down a specific skill tree, is all.**

**Anyways****! Review, favorite, and follow my dudes, returnees and first-timers alike. This is Erithemaeus, signing out!**


	4. Chapter 1-4

**Deadeye**

* * *

Chapter (1.4) - A Sense of Space is Mandatory, it Seems

* * *

"You called for me, Hikigaya-san?"

The person known as Shiota Nagisa is many things. Short, with a head of blue hair that I could not understand on as to how and why it was natural. An effeminate figure that most of the class simply assumed was a girl cross-dressing as one of the guys. Would-be homicide victim from an event a few days ago due to the plans of Terasaka and his lackeys. If I were a betting individual (which I am usually not), I knew something was off the moment he came into class after the event looking like he never lost a day in his life. When I heard (eavesdropped, but still heard nonetheless) a few of his acquaintances mumbling on how he began listing off the alien monster's different weaknesses, I knew that I had to get him on board.

Which makes him deserve the proper courtesy of returning his greeting, as blase and obvious as it were. Thus, I nod, and motion to the seat in front of me. If Takebayashi wasn't here during lunch break, then he wouldn't mind me borrowing his chair for something phenomenally more important than whatever's running through his otaku mind.

"Indeed. Thanks for humoring my request, by the way."

"No need to be so formal, Hikigaya-san. You rarely ask for help anyway, so it's probably a once-in-a-lifetime chance that I get just by helping you out." Is that so. Then please explain as to why you're still speaking formally then, you hypocrite. "So, what is it that you want to talk about?"

To answer his question, I rummaged underneath my desk and brought out a notebook with a leather cover. Nondescript, save for a small inscription in English by the bottom right of the spine.

"I want for us to compare notes."

"You're planning your own assassination too?" Nagisa asked with wide eyes, to which I huffed and shook my head in response. I placed the notebook on the table even as Nagisa revealed his own steno pad, a vivid yellow with two white circles by the middle. Is that supposed to represent that alien monster? If so, then either Nagisa was dedicated to the job, or he was asking for a death sentence. I wouldn't know what to do with the visage of _that _monster watching over me while I sleep.

"No. At the very least, not yet." I replied with another shake of the head. Too many people mingling around with one another in their various groups, eavesdropping on this conversation right at the very moment. Plus, I'm pretty sure that the alien monster was watching too. Probably holed up in the faculty office and giggling as if everything was going to plan. Or went to China for a quick food stop. I wouldn't judge that monster's tastes. "I just wanted to get some information. I've been trying to find that thing's weaknesses, and you seem to be doing the same thing. We might get onto something here if we share our knowledge and theories."

"That's true." Stop nodding emphatically. That thoughtful look on your face doesn't suit you at all. Really. "So, what have you gotten from Korosensei?"

...

The alien monster's got a name now? I know that it's annoying to refer to him as 'alien monster' or 'monster' or 'Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, alien monster' and the like, but isn't that a bit too on the nose? Who even suggested the name, anyway? And haven't you watched any kind of films about assassins or whatever? That the moment they start naming their target, everything begins to go down on a downward spiral that eventually leads you to falling in love with the target instead?

Yup. Disgusting. Scrub that image from my mind. I didn't need any _more _nightmares that could come from that image whatsoever. Best focus on the conversation for now.

"Not much", I admitted, opening my notebook to reveal an alright sketch of that alien monster, Korosensei, whatever the class names the damn thing. Too much detail and I could be mistaken for a creep. Not enough detail and I couldn't label anything even remotely relevant to the situation at hand. I guess Nagisa's going to be Goldilocks in this case. Too detailed, or not enough? The intrigued expression on his face didn't really give me much of anything. "But I could make some inferences based on what that thing's abilities are. You know about that time wherein w– the class was experimenting with physical and chemical changes and the like?"

"Wasn't that the one wherein Korosensei stole all of the sweets and candies that we bought, claiming that they're all 'contaminated' and the like?" Yes. That was exactly it. It seems that I forgot to add 'food-grabber' to the list of unsavory descriptions that I had for that alien monster. Not only did it dare threaten Komachi and rip out all of my hand-grown tulips, it even had the gall to confiscate the Pocky that I had been saving up this Saturday. One way or another, that petty bastard was going to die. Even if it was correct in saying that the food was contaminated since we were experimenting without any kind of sterilization on the work surfaces beforehand, and the fact that we weren't wearing any form of personal protective equipment.

"That's the one." I darkly mutter under my breath, and I heard the scraping of wood on wood as Nagisa inched away from me. I wasn't doing anything weird, was I? Oh who cares. I'm sure that I did something weird. "Anyway, I've been thinking on as to why the bastard needs so much of it that he's willing to swindle an entire class's worth of sweets and candies, and I've come to a grim conclusion."

"... Korosensei's broke?"

"I'll be surprised if that monster gets any form of salary from teaching here." I dryly replied, snorting at the mere thought of it before dismissing the thought as hearsay. Too farfetched of an idea to ever come to light. Besides, how is that monster going to buy things with his salary when it's three meters tall, has yellow skin, and enough tentacles on its body to make any sane individual call the cops on sight? No. That monster didn't have a salary whatsoever. "No, what I was thinking of is more along the lines of basic biology. As in, how does that monster keep on moving at Mach 20 without being tired? Something along those lines."

Nagisa looked dumbstruck. I expected nothing less, since the fact that the class haven't done some brainstorming ever since they lost sight of that ten billion yen reward. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm still pissed that no one told me about the reward. I mean, ten billion yen? Even if we split it up into the rest of our class, it's still a ludicrously large amount of money. Enough that I can supposed my househusband dreams without being a... y'know, househusband.

Of course, there was still the matter of actually killing the Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing taskmaster of an alien monster, but baby steps. At the very last, it gave me even more motivation to put that alien monster pronto, threatening Komachi aside. Well that and saving the world, but that was kind of a given.

"I... haven't thought of that, really." Nagisa admitted, blinking once before rearing back with a thoughtful expression on his face. "So, you mean to say that Korosensei stocks up on energy by consuming sweets and the like? Granted, they do contain a lot of sugar..."

I watch with bated breath as I waited for Nagisa to come to the same conclusion as mine. His face lights up a moment later, and a smile crosses his face as he stared at me with newfound energy. "You're planning on poisoning Korosensei?"

"Poisoning's a bit much." I mumble in reply, even as a large part of my thought process snickered at the thought of it. As it was, I still have too little information to figure out as to what kind of poison actually works on that alien monster. Maybe a liquid form of the coating that the government uses for the rubber knives and BB pellets? I am... _not _looking forward to my future conversation with Karasuba-sensei. "I was thinking more along the lines of just sabotaging his food supply for now. Let his mind to the rest of the work. Make that alien monster see shadows that aren't really there, you know?"

Nagisa seemed to inch further back, scratching their cheek while letting out an awkward laugh. "Did anyone tell you that you're scary when you try, Hikigaya-san? Because you are."

"I'll take that as a compliment." It really is, considering that it was Nagisa giving the praise. "Anyway, that's what I've been able to figure out so far, along with my plan for the moment. You think you can fill in the rest?"

"Probably", Nagisa admitted, nodding along while holding up his yellow steno, "Although, all that I've been able to figure out so far are some of his behaviors and the like. It's not much, but it should probably be enough for what you're planning to do, Hikigaya-san."

"That's a deal, then." I summarize, offering Nagisa a hand as he blinked at me and shook it a few seconds later. Blood pounded against my ears while I hope my breath for a single instant, but I managed to power through with a shaky smile and a little watering of the eyes. Nagisa reared back, laying out another one of his awkward laughs, and began avoiding my gaze.

"Say, Hikigaya-san..." He began, "... Did anyone ever tell you that it's creepy when you smile like that?"

Smiling.

...

Sure, let's go with that.

* * *

[—|—]

* * *

"Aargh..."

"Put some effort in this, at the very least..."

Don't sound so disappointed, Karasuma-sensei. You know this is the best that I can do. Actually, I'm glad that you used me as demonstration material (beat me up) so that I wouldn't be humiliated in front of the entire class. You know, since each and every one of us is so far under your level that most of us would assume that I'm actually trying my best to hit you. Although I hold no reservations of being unable to do so for... a long time. Considering you know, I don't want to get hit and I don't want to hit anything in the first place.

"I am, Karasuba-sensei."

"Try harder." He says with an annoyed lilt in his voice as he strikes me once again with renewed fervor. I freeze up, blood pounding against my ears and my breath beginning to hitch at the worst possible time. It takes a few moments for me to return back to normal, and by doing so I found myself staring up at a sunny blue sky, Karasuba's face sporting an apologetic expression on his face.

"Sorry." It's genuine as well, from what I can tell. I raise my hands in surrender and slowly pull myself back up, scraping off the bits and pieces of dirt that I managed to get on me during my impromptu trip to the ground, and cleaned myself off just as I spot Karasuba holding an arm out towards me.

We stood there in awkward silence for at least a second before I managed to break up the tension. "Sorry."

"Right. Should've known. Think nothing of it — my mistake, is all."

Yup. Awkward. Hard to try and get anything done if the rest of the class is solely getting clued into the little skit that Karasuba and I were doing. This is stupid. Going on like this would be stupid, and would attract unwanted attention. I mimed a tired smile and haunched forward, meeting gazes with Karasuba to see if he would get the hint. At the very least, he knew what to do.

"Hikigaya, keep on doing your knifework. I'll be checking on your classmates." I nod, straightening myself back into a ready position as Karasuba passes by me and goes to check on the other pairs for today's PE training. My arms screamed as I attempted to slice a particular baleful patch of air in front of me for the nth time, but I still kept on going. Yup, no rest for the wicked until the class is over.

Damn, do I hate PE with a passion. Nothing but physical activity after physical activity, doing repetitive routines that would waste time better spent on planning to kill that alien monster. Still, sacrifices have to be made. I need to make sure that everything is clear before I can put plan A into action. If that meant buttering up Karasuba-sensei, then so be it.

Besides, it's just a few laxatives, is all. Nothing bad if it takes effect, and if it does... What _would _happen if it works? Do I even want to know what happens then?

...

Best not to think about it. That way lay nightmares of the highest order. Just keep on training. Slash. Thrust. Slash. Thrust. No one must know what happens in my thoughts. They'd go insane.

"You're looking more dedicated than the past fine minutes. I take it that something happened?"

I stare into Karasuba's eyes and tried my best to keep a scowl from forming on my face. Given that his eyes narrowed into slits, I probably had something on my face. Probably the eyes. Most definitely the eyes. What else is there to except the eyes?

"Hikigaya."

"Wait." I rasped out, frowning while all but collapsing on the spot. Alright, new plan. Might as well do some exercises while I'm at home. At this rate, even Nagisa was fitter than me. That was just too embarrassing to properly work on. "I'm just... trying to put this in a way that you wouldn't smack me in the head for."

"Oh, you're already halfway there..."

I ignored Karasuba's mumbling and pinched the bridge of my nose. How to put this, how to put this... "Karasuba-sensei."

"Like I told you, it's Karasu_ma_. Get it right, will you?"

"Is it fine if I put laxatives into that alien monster's meals?"

Silence. Not that was unexpected, but at the very least seeing Karasuba-sensei's constipated expression was worth it. I mean, talk about a poker face. All I could get to determine his exasperation was a single twitch of his brow,

Anyways, that was pretty much my plan for the moment. The laxatives were nothing more than a test run to see if I can find a way to inject substances into that alien monster's body. After that, then I might move on to more lethal stuff. Like the coating that the government uses on the rubber knives and BB pellets used to try and hit that alien monster. Pretty simple. Not a lot of moving parts that could go wrong. All I need to do is to sneak it in wherever the alien bastard is off doing who knows what. Last I heard, it assaulted a baseball game, for some reason.

"... As long as you do it by yourself, then I see no problem with it." Karasuba-sensei eventually replied, looking like he might check his next meals to see if someone had put laxatives in them. Not that I had been planning to do so, of course. Promise.

"Thanks." I reply with a thin smile, glancing towards Nagisa and giving him a thumbs-up. He froze on the spot with an awkward grin on his face, and sent me a thumbs-up as well before turning back to whatever he was doing. Truly, one deserving the most gratitude should avoid it like the plague.

"You're welcome." Karasuba curtly replied, raising his voice to be heard over the din of the class. "Everyone, class is over! All of you can take a break before the next period starts!"

Oh thank goodness. I let out a relieved sigh as my legs give out, laying spread eagle against the ground while I tried to catch my breath. To no avail of course, since I was still hyperventilating a storm. At the very least, the class (torture) is over. If I do remember the class's schedule for the day, it's a ten minute break between PE and World History. And I'm still too tired to even try and 'negotiate' with that alien monster.

"Yo, Nagisa. Long time no see."

At the very least, it provided me a good look at the newcomer that appeared on top of the stone steps, all but desecrating my best place with their smugness and overall riajuu vibe. Did they look like a psychopath? Yes. Do they look like a riajuu? Most definitely yes. So, they're automatically on my list of 'interests'. The fact that they're related with Nagisa only drives then further up my interest list.

Still, judging by the bloodthirsty look that they're giving that alien monster, it would seem like they'd make a great ally in my crusade against that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing taskmaster of an alien monster. My opinion was only reinforced by the fact that the alien monster was missing a limb or two in the first five minutes of meeting the thing.

Now, if only I can get the scowl off my face. I need whoever that guy is on my side, riajuu or not.

* * *

**AN: And so ends the introductory arc. Very short. Can binge read through the entire thing in one sitting. More reviews are very well appreciated. Will Hachiman succeed in his plan to put some laxatives in Korosensei's meals? Will he be able to get over his budding hatred for riajuus and successfully convince Karma to cooperate? Find out next time, on Dr— Deadeye, Arc 2!****Interlude's coming up next. Remember to review, follow, and favorite. This is Erithemaeus, I wish you guys an advanced New Year's!****PS: My resolution? 'Make sure my friends won't bug me about Deadeye.' Pretty simple stuff. How about you?**


	5. Interlude - 'Karasuba'

**Deadeye**

* * *

Interlude - 'Karasuba'

* * *

There was something... off, about that student known as Hikigaya Hachiman. Make no mistake, each student profile that I read about the E-class was off in a couple of ways, but it was Hikigaya's that clued me in that something was wrong with this school due to the sheer amount of discrepancies that I can find between the file and the real thing. His file speaks of him as a dangerous individual subverting the school's vision by brainwashing students to fulfill his own objectives, but I find no real evidence pertaining to his so-called 'malicious' motives. An individual that grates on my nerves sure, given the fact that he chooses to address me by the wrong name with each and every opportunity, but having no characteristics that would describe him as being capable of being the dangerous individual that his student profile frames him as.

Charismatic? Far from it. The student known as Hikigaya Hachiman is the furthest thing from charismatic. He actively shuns attention, preferring to instead watch over events from the sidelines. He detests contact, although a large part of it can be contributed to his haphephobia. Even still, he seems to positively revel in the fact that he is isolated from the rest of his peers, as if preferring the act of isolation over socialization. Coming from a family of four with a good relationship with his sister, he should _not _become someone with a personality like he is today. He should be like the rest of his classmates, more concerned about looking good for the ladies and craving companionship rather than seeking the solace of silence.

If it was any consolation (even still, it is relatively few), Hikigaya seems to have some self-awareness to this... flaw of his. Judging by how he had subtly urged me to look deeper into his files, it would seem that his flaws were one that he has acknowledged, yet eventually came to accept as part of his being nonetheless. Something was wrong. And judging by his relatively lackluster family life, I had branched out a bit further, piqued by the stirrings of a curiosity that was better solved than hungering behind bars.

And what I found was... it had explained a lot. Maybe his tip was a silent plea for help, tempered by broken expectations and forged with the few remaining bonds that he has left. Which is at this point, relatively few. Sparingly few. Worryingly few.

Hikigaya Hachiman is an individual that required companionship from the bottom of his heart, but refused to show it for the fear of being perceived as a weakness. Thus, it left him in a situation wherein he strove to keep the bonds that he currently has... and to make sure that those bonds never came to harm.

While that alien monster's — that Korosensei's — actions were warranted in order to stop any thought of using fellow classmates as bait... for someone like Hikigaya who thought the world of his family (or at the very least, his sister), I wouldn't be surprised if he would do everything in his power to bring down the giant known as Korosensei. That kind of anger would normally be expressed in an increase in aggression, but Hikigaya had once again broken and met my expectations.

When I saw him look upon Akabane Karma with a calculating gleam in his eyes, it brought an unnatural chill down my spine. Maybe it was due to the fact that such an expression should be seen on someone so young. Or maybe it was due to the fact that I had expected him to look for potential allies in his crusade, and it seemed like he had found one at last. All I can do is hope that I may be able to steer him away from his path of cold, calculated revenge. There was nothing that lay on the end of that road but ruin.

Hikigaya Hachiman is a logical person. It at the very least, that is what I could surmise from the bragging that the being known as Korosensei liked to indulge itself in from time to time. Perfect marks in every subject. A clinical approach to essays. Almost like a machine. A shell of a human being hollowed out by outside influences until there was virtually nothing left. At the very least, giving him the time and space to think is the first step to his recovery. But at the same time, supervision must be undertaken to keep him from reaffirming his own beliefs.

Although I must admit, there was something morbidly amusing about the way he has asked me for permission to coat that Korosensei's meals with laxatives. Maybe it was the way that he held his normally caustic language whenever asking for clarifications. Or one could probably chalk it up to the fact that he seems to value my input more than others, or at the very least, arrange things in an attempt to please me for whatever reason. He should know by now that teachers don't pick favorites.

As an aside, while I don't know how he would be able to sneak in laxatives without the octopus-like being finding out, I don't know if I should be looking forward to the results or not. While it would certainly be an amusing thought watching that Korosensei suffer the effects of a laxative, I dare not to think of the actual effects.

Then again, I needed to keep an eye out just in case that Hikigaya does something unexpected. Which, at the rate that the year is passing, would most undoubtedly happen sometime within the season.

... Ha. And to think that I originally wanted to keep a closer eye on the students just in case that Korosensei repeated that dangerous stunt... Since when did I become sort of a secret pseudo-therapist to a middle school student?

I think it might be best to leave that question unanswered. For now, at the very least.

* * *

[—|—]

* * *

"Ah. Kajima-sensei."

I refrain from the nigh-instinctive twitch of my brow while finishing up my daily report. No new developments, all things steady, overall an average day. Just three hundred something days left before an alien monster looks us all. However, I never thought that I'd see the day where I would be able to feel some sort of pity for this Korosensei.

Hikigaya stands in front of the doorway leading towards the faculty office, fidgeting and acting like his age. Of course, I already knew what he was here for, and a quick glance around the room is enough to ascertain that the alien being that goes by Korosensei is not here in the room. With a sigh, Hikigaya drops the façade, an eerily blank expression behind his face as he steps into the room with a wary expression, as if expecting the universe to conspire against him. Given his past, it was a valid — if not a but paranoid — fear.

"Like I told you, my name is _Karasuma._" I stress once more for the nth time of the day. This was something that happened every time we meet. More of a ritual than not between him and me. Nevertheless, I refrained from showing any form of annoyance to the mistaken name, and placed my laptop to sleep before meeting Hikigaya's gaze.

As per usual, there was a frightening amount of apathy in those eyes. It was no wonder that most of his peers avoid him and talk under their breath about the sheer_ wrongness _that they felt upon meeting his gaze, but it was not the crux of the matter. I kept on holding his gaze, watching as the familiar signs of wariness and paranoia eventually give way to the slightest hint of relief. As if he was expecting that one day, I would not be able to meet his gaze. That the whispers and mutterings that he chose to ignore every time he walked beneath another's gaze were true. That there was reason to keep his emotions away from everyone around him.

I was tempted to feel pity, but I knew Hikigaya would never accept such a thing. Thus, I kept the conversation going, snapping my gaze towards the white packet that Hikigaya held in his right hand.

"So, what's that?"

"Can't tell. Sorry." Judging by the grin on his face, he wasn't feeling that apologetic. "You just need to know that I might or might not have stopped by here before next period, and that I may or may not have talked to you while I was here."

Plausible deniability. As annoying as it was too be faced by that same dilemma, it was nonetheless interesting to see someone as young as Hikigaya abusing all of the inherent loopholes without impunity. How admirable. Not. He was supposed to be having Geography. Just how did he manage to sneak out of the classroom without even a single person noticing?

"KARMA-KUN!"

... That would do. Especially given his stealth skills which just borders on ludicrous. If even the alien monster capable of traveling at Mach 20 was sometimes incapable of noticing your approach, then Hikigaya could easily escape more than a dozen pair of eyes if someone proved to be a capable distraction. It would seem like I was lucky in troubleshooting the internet connection here to even see Hikigaya tiptoeing into the room.

My eyes wandered, finding Hikigaya methodically unfolding cabinets, folders, and notebooks to reveal an assortment of sweets that I can guess is that Korosensei's stash. While I had been privy to my... _colleague's _eccentricities since the past couple of days, I had only known about their sugar addiction about two days ago. Just how the hell did the rumor spread so fast? Or was it an educated guess instead? It would seem like the later was more likely for someone like Hikigaya.

Nevertheless, a quick rip of the white packaging sends a powder throughout the stack of hidden sweets, coating then with whatever substance Hikigaya had procured from... somewhere. Best not think about _where _he had gotten such a thing, and hope that he had went through the proper channels.

It took Hikigaya a while to finish doping every hidden stash with whatever substance that he had on him, finishing up by dusting off his hands all over my co-worker's chair. I raised a brow at the sight of his gloved hands, but nevertheless kept my vigil and listened to the being known as Korosensei continuing his discussion.

"Thanks, Karasuma-sensei."

My gaze turns towards Hikigaya, but he was already off towards his classroom, the soft patter of his slippers against the wood signifying that he _was_ indeed going back to his class. All the while, I listened to the sound of diminishing footsteps with a complicated expression on my face, wincing as my... 'co-worker' once again blew up upon finding another one of his students disobeying his rules.

So, he knew my name all along. And here I was, starting to think that Hikigaya was much more scatterbrained than he usually was.

That little rascal.

...

Somehow, the thought brings a smile to my face.


	6. Chapter 2-1

**Deadeye**

* * *

Chapter (2.1) - Making Alliances with a Psychopath is Weirdly Expected

* * *

Day three of putting my 'dose-that-alien-monster's-food-with-laxatives' plan. So far I have not seen any results, but I shall cherish the experiences that came with it. Not. I'm not an idiot who's willing to indulge themselves in the sunk-cost fallacy. Another day of being unable to spot any signs of difference, and I'm relegating plan 'dose-that-alien-monster's-food-with-laxatives' to the sidelines. Of course, valuable extracurricular training in stealth and perception is still a huge bonus. Except for the last time wherein Karasuba-sensei saw me snooping around the faculty room.

The experience was harrowing, no doubt about it. I can't help but get jitters when I'm recalling the memories. Not only was I found out, I had even called Karasuba-sensei by the wrong name. 'Karasuma'. Hah. As if anyone went by that name.

...

Hopefully I'll be able to feign sickness by the time that PE class falls around. I don't want to become Karasuba-sensei's sparring partner (student piñata) once more. My still-aching muscles were a grim reminder of that horrid time.

"You're... Hikigaya, right? If what I heard from Nagisa is correct." I glance up from my thoughts to see Akabane Karma sitting on a chair in front of me, a grin on his face as he leaned forward against the backrest. Red hair as distinctive as Nagisa and Kayano's own, with pale gray eyes that slanted downwards like a snake. Or a blade. Whatever. All I needed to know at the moment was that grin didn't bode too well for my current state of zen.

"Is there a problem?" I reply back, keeping my tone even while I meet his gaze. There was no doubt that Akabane Karma was dangerous. It was why we were currently here in the faculty room waiting for that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing taskmaster of an alien monster to decide on our so-called 'punishments'. Karma for interrupting class, and mine for sneaking out the first chance that I got. I had miscalculated the time that it took for that alien monster to notice my presence. Hopefully, it won't happen again.

"No, it's just that... Hm, you're interesting."

I blanched. Nope. Not going there. I am a heterosexual male, attracted to girls just like other hot-blooded males my age. Of course, there was the slim chance of considering that the psychopath was interested in anything other that _that_, but it meant attracting the attention of someone like Akabane Karma in the first place. It couldn't be anything good.

As if reading my thoughts, Karma's grin grew even wider. "You know, I was bored for a while, so I decided to check up on some files while you're off doing whatever it is you do." He fished a folder from the nearby desk, waving it around as if it was some sort of prize. Perhaps it was, if I was any other person, seeing my name in print by the upper-right corner of the folder. Not that I am, though. Judging by the slight frown on Karma's face, I knew that my reaction wasn't what he expected one bit.

"Talk." He said, and so I did.

"Nothing more than someone being used as a pawn for another." I replied back, voice even and eyes devoid of emotion. It wouldn't do if my plans are revealed here. Most likely, Karma had already done his research the moment he saw my _interesting _file and came to a most likely conclusion. All that's left is to subtly stoke his confirmation bias and be done with it. "I was going to the E class whether I wanted to or not, so he decided to bring an additional pair of eyes."

'He' being the principal, of course. Not that it didn't need any further clarification, given the bored look on Karma's face.

"Ah, is that so? Boring, then." A dejected expression crossed his face. "And here I was, offering an alliance with you. Turns out you're just another lackey."

"You could have started with that instead of beating around the bush." I replied with a sigh, ignoring the sudden sharp look that Karma gave me. "If you want to waste your time, don't me into it. You could very well do it yourself."

My eyes stared into Karma's own, our little stare-off continuing for a while until he grinned and got out of his chair. A second later, I find him proffering his hand in front of me, the same sick grin on his face when he took off that alien monster's tentacle-arm-thing. If one said that he was menacing enough, then his expression was downright malicious. Not that I hadn't expected as much, however. If it meant that he was going to ally with my efforts to eliminate that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing taskmaster of an alien monster, then I'd gladly put myself in the firing line.

No sacrifice too great. I'll kill that 'Korosensei'... whatever it takes.

"We're going to have a _very _interesting partnership, Hikigaya."

I grin, more to hide the panic than anything else as blood begins to pound in my ears. My lips drew a shallow breath, clasping Karma's proferred hand with a vice grip while he tried to crush my hand wholesale. I laughed to keep the tears from stinging my eyes, meanwhile Karma did the same to prove to me without a doubt that he's a psychopath.

"Alright you two, stop that laughter right now!" The door slams open to reveal the alien monster, allaying my suspicions that he had been spying on the both of us for our conversation. Nevertheless, that tidbit was shuffled to a corner of my mind as my eyes widen, the results of my efforts finally beating fruit. "... If you two say something about my state, then you would be having your punishments by the main campus."

"Look at it Hikigaya." Karma said, the malicious gleam in his eyes compounded by the schadenfreude that I have upon seeing that alien monster reduced to this state. "He looks like one of those slimes that you beat up in the tutorial level and everything."

Indeed. Karma's description was accurate. The fact that the laxatives had worked was still a bit dizzying, but I couldn't help but bark out a peal of laughter when the yellow slime-like creature began turning red.

Just to see if it affected anything though, I shot a single BB round. The bastard dodged, and tried to reform itself into what it once was. Utterly failing in the process.

Somewhere beneath our laughter, I vaguely heard the alien monster saying something about assigning us to change the flower beds of the main campus, but I was still busy laughing in order to pay it any thought.

* * *

[—|—]

* * *

I should've paid it a thought. Maybe a few more thoughts. At the very least, even if I could not avoid my destination, I could still be prepared for the trials and tribulations that I would be going through. Now however, there is nothing left but regret.

Judging by the stormy look on Karma's face, I could assume that he thought the same.

"The moment I get back, I'll bury my knives inside that monster's skull..."

He looked furious. I was keeping my breathing calm so that I wouldn't devolve into hysterics. Planting flowers? _Again_? After what that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, taskmaster of an alien monster had done to my plot of painstakingly hand-grown tulips, he's forcing us to do the same thing for the entirety of the main campus' flowerbeds? Where the rest of the idiots around here wouldn't appreciate the amount of time and effort that it took to transplant these tulips into new soil?

Unforgivable. Truly unforgivable. It is during times like these that I know I am facing a monster the likes of which humanity has never seen before.

"Not if I get to him first."

"Really?" Karma asked, turning towards me with a bewildered expression on his face. "I seem to remember you hacking and wheezing just fine minutes in PE. Do you seriously think that you can stand a chance against me if I gunned for that Korosensei?"

"... I could shoot it."

Karma blinked, realization crossing his eyes before turning back to the flowerbed with a scowl. If I was miffed at the way he seemed to be stabbing the trowel into the soil, then I didn't show it. He was probably just waiting for me to show some sort of reaction. One that I wasn't willing to give him. Besides, it's just transplanting fully-grown tulips, not growing them from scratch. Less effort, so less care that I have to give.

"Oh, what's this? Is this a wild Hikigaya I see, stuck doing punishment for the E-class?"

... Just my luck. I could see Karma pause out of the corner of my eye, digging out his trowel and gazing at it with a curious glint in his eye. Not good. At this rate, I'd be playing an accomplice to a homicide that _wasn't_ related to that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, vindictive taskmaster of an alien monster. If Karasuba even heard a word of this, I'd be toast.

I'd rather not be indebted to the principal if I can help it.

My eyes met Karma's gaze, and I slowly shook my head. A gesture so miniscule that the idiots behind us probably won't notice, but Karma would most definitely do. They weren't worth the risk. Especially since even injuring them would cause a lot more headache than he could ever imagine.

Rein in your dumb dogs, Shu. You'd best bet that I'd be calling you later for this, the principal's bugs be damned.

"You know, it was probably the right decision for the principal to transfer you to the E class. How is it, hm? To live out the dream that you've been spouting on since you transferred here, hm?"

"How's the broken nose, Seo?" I replied back, grinning at his companion doing his best to rein one of his fellow idiots back in line. Go on. Go against Shu's orders, I dare you. "Judging from the fact that your English is still as embarrassing as ever, I'd say it's going to take a couple of weeks before you can go ahead and insult someone without looking like a swollen grape."

I waved then goodbye, ignoring the curses sent my way while I listened to their receding footsteps. I finished up my side of the plot and turned towards Karma, finishing up his own side with a few more stabs at the soil than necessary.

"So, have you thought of anything that you'd do tomorrow?"

Karma grunted and glanced towards me, gripping the trowel in a reverse grip. There was no mistaking the malicious glint in his eyes as he grinned. "Hm... I don't know. Maybe you could help me out, just in case I got a few things wrong."

And the trowel's for a healthy conversation. Got it.

"Judging by the fact that Nagisa's still alive, it means that the alien monster is motivated to keep us safe... for whatever reason." I began, Karma humming alongside me a moment later. Something needed to come from this. While I wasn't exactly the most logical of individuals under pressure, even just a few more seconds might be enough for me to form the beginnings of a plan. So think. What could that alien monster's actions mean? Was it part of its deal with the government? But Karasuba had said that it would be teaching Kunugigaoka's 'vaunted' E class under the sole condition that it wouldn't hurt the students comprising it. It didn't mention anything related to preventing a student from being hurt. If so... But there's too little evidence... However, if it's true...

... How quaint. The alien monster that threatened our families has some sort of obligation to protect us from harm. Was it did to the deal? Or was it something else?

Oh who am I kidding. It's all part of the deal. There is no way that thing had threatened Komachi and thought that it could get away by having a twisted sort of morality.

"You can put that monster in a catch-22." I began once more, the plan simply _clicking _into place. A smile forms on my face, although it was quickly wiped off when I realized what I was asking Karma to do. "For some reason, that alien monster is determined to keep us safe. You could use that."

"Hm..." I knew that something was wrong when Karma simply nodded and grinned. He should've asked me as to why he was risking his ass of on something that I said. _Anyone _with their head on straight should be asking that. Even I was expecting him to object to a plan that involved risking their own life. I sure as hell won't. I've still got Komachi here, and I'm not sure if I want to think of her face as she approaches my casket.

... Yeah, no. Keep that locked away at the furthest depths of my mind.

"That's a pretty good idea, actually." Karma muttered out loud, more to my benefit than his own. I can already see his mind moving along in a frantic pace, going through details that I couldn't see. "... Yeah, I can work with this. This is the last flowerbed for the day, right?"

"Pretty much."

"Good." I didn't bother looking up to see the bloodthirsty expression on Karma's face. The tingles at the back of my spine were enough. "Keep watch tomorrow, Hikigaya. I have a feeling that you'd want to be at the front row. Clean up my stuff for me as well, will you? I still have to prepare a few things."

The pit in my gut burned as I watched Karma stroll off with a single wave, leaving me to clean up his mess. I'm pretty sure I just sent him to his death, and he didn't even bat an eye. Something wrong with him. He's missing something fundamental in order for him to take a step back and assess a plan that might involve his death if done incorrectly.

Maybe Karma was just too into the act of killing that alien monster to even care about his own life.

...

I began cleaning up our gardening tools.

* * *

**AN: Second arc starts here! As usual with Hikigaya, so perceptive with others, yet unable to turn that same perception onto himself. A bit more info about his circumstances as well. I'll let you guys piece together everything before I reveal it. It's more fun that way, after all.****Going into the feedback... Yup. Hachiman's going for stealth here, preferably with a long-range weapon like a sniper and the like. Kind of like Hayami and Chiba, but the rest of the class doesn't know just _where _the shots are coming from and who's firing them.****Although he's still not a badass yet. Karasuma's just assuming things.****In any case, thank you all for the feedback that you're giving me. I really appreciate it. If you want more Deadeye action, then be sure to follow, favorite, and leave a couple of reviews! Erithemaeus here, and thanks for reading my work!**


	7. Chapter 2-2

**Deadeye**

* * *

Chapter (2.2) - Making Alliances With a Psychopath is Weirdly Expected

* * *

Guilt. It was an emotion that I was intimately familiar with every time I check up on Komachi with my bugged phone. It was a corrosive state of mind that plagued one with crippling self-doubt and second guessing, your mind stuck on the moment wherein everything went wrong. I see it behind my eyelids, waiting upon that train station with baggage in hand and Komachi begging me not to go.

Now I see it behind someone with red hair and pale eyes, a bruise slowly forming on their cheek.

I blink, gawking at my fist, then back towards Karma. He was currently on the floor, looking suitable chastised while cradling his cheek. Surprise colored his face, which I am sure mirrored my own, and I shakily release a breath while taking a single step back. Then another. And then another. My backside hit the ground a moment later, and my mind began racing to ask the questions that I should've asked a while ago.

"Why the _hell _did you do that." My voice was calm. Constrained. Barely hiding the anger and outrage that simmered beneath my eyes. Come to think of it, I had only met this idiot a few days ago. His sudden jump into suicidal territory wasn't supposed to elicit such a reaction from me. We were barely friends. Merely allies of convenience, formed by the overpowering might of that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing taskmaster of an alien monster. By now, everyone in the class had heard of Karma's little stint, of how he had jumped off the cliff with a smile on his face just to get a shot at that alien monster. Anger should be there. Outrage should be there. Shock should be there. At the very least, someone should have given a look of surprise at the deed.

But nothing. No one had reacted one bit when that alien monster had all but detailed what had happened yesterday afternoon. It had rankled something within me, and I had marched off towards the infirmary to see Karma lounging on a bed looking no worse for wear.

So I punched him, to make sure that he was at the very least in the infirmary for _something_. Or maybe it was to vent out a few thoughts that I didn't want scurrying around in the back of my mind. Maybe it was a bit of both.

_"Shu. Do you really think that you can get revenge on your father by doing this? You can't feel satisfaction if you're dead."_

_"Then you shall be my stand-in. You know what he did. What he's continuing on doing. I'm at my wit's end, Hachiman. I... I don't know if I can keep on doing this."_

_"Look at me. I'm the same. Yet you don't see me jumping off the roof with you."_

_"It's different, Hachiman. I'm not as strong as you."_

I opened my eyes, teeth gritted while moving in for another punch. This time it was slow. Sloppy. So telegraphed that even a blind man could see it coming. As expected, Karma caught it, and begun crushing my waist. I focused on the pain, letting out a sharp sigh to clear my mind. Pain was always a friend. It was a focus; a way to cut off all branching thoughts and focusing them in one place.

Still, _ow_. "Oi Hikigaya, who told you that you can just punch me straight out of nowhere, eh?"

"That was a freebie." I snapped back, yanking on my hand as Karma let go. The groan that he let out while picking himself off the floor gave me a little bit of schadenfreude. Just a little bit. I didn't realize that I had sucker-punched the idiot to the floor. "There's more of that coming if you do something as idiotic as jumping off a cliff again."

"Going soft on me, Hikigaya?"

"More like there's no one as idiotic as you to carry out my plans." I grumbled under my breath, proffering my arm as I pulled Karma up a second later and dumped him back on the bed. "Keep still. I'll search the shelves to see if there's something that can help with the bruise."

Not that I am confident that I would be finding anything. I've been here yesterday, spiking that alien monster's medicine to counteract the excess laxative in its system. Not that it helped since the monster was out rescuing Karma from his idiocy, but I wouldn't be too surprised to find nothing but a couple of bandages and dressing here. Which I did, tucked away in a corner alongside a few first-aid essentials. I stared at in surprise for a second before grabbing it as well, going back to the infirmary bed and checking if I had what I needed to treat Karma's bruise.

… Wait. I just needed a cold compress for this. Damn it.

"So, why are you doing this exactly?"

"I thought already told you as to why." I snapped back, rummaging around the lacking facilities and eventually running across a cooler box loosely hidden away beneath some floorboards. The ice cream inside was a dead giveaway to the identity of the idiot that left it there. With a sigh, I spike the ice cream with a few pinches of laxative whilst scooping some of the ice, stripping off my cardigan and using it to hold the ice. A quick toss to Karma later, and I place the cooler back where it was originally 'hidden'. Two birds with one stone. "I need someone idiotic enough to go be my guinea pig so I can gather information on that alien monster."

"You and Nagisa sharing information wasn't enough? And you're sure that you can kill this guy?" There was a sneer in Karma's voice, one I ignored in order to stuff back the supplies that I had taken from the cabinets. Still, it didn't stop me from getting a word in edgewise.

"I don't see _you _doing any better." I ground back, relishing in the flash of anger behind his eyes. The clack of a wooden latch closes the cabinet for medical supplies, and I turn back towards Karma with a scowl. "Now seeing as you're still stuck there for the time being, I guess I'll keep you company for a while."

"Like I said, just what are you—"

"You're not the only individual able to get another's file just by sneaking around, Karma." I curtly replied, getting straight to the point. Karma froze, his eyes narrowing in suspicion, and my scowl returned to a neutral line. Go on. Investigate. Not that you'd be able to, but I'd like to see you try. "And you're most definitely not the only person able to see the rotten system that makes up the core of this rotten school."

What happened to Karma was just additional confirmation. A quick look at the dossiers of each E-class member was enough to get my blood boiling. Everything that was out of the principal's vision is to be torn down and ridiculed. Truly, an idiotic approach to a simple problem. In fact, the principal's approach to the situation was mind-boggingly moronic. Competition is fine. It breeds the drive to grow and prosper, to give a goal to idealistic little brats like others my age that wabted to get into a high-end high school to a high-end college straight to a high-end job. But constraining individuals to fit the overall mold of rigorous competition is just stupid. People at my age are in the swing of puberty, with all of the hormones that it entailed. They want to branch out. They want to experience the 'joys of freedom'. To them, freedom is the most important thing that they yearn for in this stage of life. Stifling it only breeds resentment and hate. Fear can only work for so long before other emotions start to seep in.

How long would it take for someone in the other classes to get over their fear of being chucked into the E class in order to help their friend? While it might work for the three short years that people my age would be going through, it would simply build up. If not now, then later. What would they do when they realize that everything that they had been taught about was a lie? That is was not due to their intelligence or capability to memorize an entire book's worth of essays to get to the top, but by the strength and numbers of the connections that they had forged with those above the corporate ladder?

I can only imagine the storm brewing up on the principal's deeds now. By what I had gathered from Shu, it was almost at a tipoing point — any inciting incident large enough to cause attention within the span of a year, and the principal would be beset upon all sides. It just so happens that we had an alien monster on campus.

Heh. How ironic.

"This system is flawed. It has its merits, but the fact remains that this faux-meritocracy is steeped underneath layers and layers of corruption so deep that politicians would gag upon the sight of it." Exaggerated metaphor it may be, but it got my message across. "I want to change it. By any means possible."

"So? Is this supposed to be a recruitment pitch or something? You're already boring me out here with your monologue." Karma yawned, adjusting his grip on his cold compress. "And if that's your main goal, then what about that Korosensei?"

"Just a case of personal vendetta, really." My voice drops to a snarl. "... That damn octopus shouldn't have done what it did."

"The whole threatening our families schtick?"

"That _thing _threatened _my _family once. I have no doubts that it could do so easily. Even if the alien monster was trying its best to be as you said... there still exists the probability— no, _certainty _— that this alien monster would have the power to act upon its threat to our families if it so desired." My eyes narrowed into slits. "I won't have that."

"So, I'm nothing more than just a lackey for you to order around to keep your family safe and bring down this... entire system?" Amusement seemed to flicker underneath Karma's eyes, a grin on his face as he extended his hand towards me. "While I don't care about your spiel about changing a few things in this school, I'm all for killing Korosensei. Just make sure you don't overstep your boundaries, and I'm sure we can work together just fine."

I didn't bother correcting him. He was right, anyway. No one can just visualize changes behind the curtain. Not anyone can see the intent behind each word said by a teacher to another. But killing that Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, taskmaster of an alien monster was infinitely easier duebto the fact that one can see him everyday. Words speak louder than actions here, however. It made it sounds like an easy task to kill that Mach 20 traveling bastard.

My hand clasps Karma's own, a single shake of the hand and a nod of the head enough to convey this tentatic alliance for the time being. Until he started crushing my hand, that is. Damn sadist.

* * *

[——]

* * *

"Korosensei, can you please taste this for me?"

"I refuse."

Okuda, if you've been paying a bit more attention lately, then you'd know that the alien monster isn't too keen on tasting anything. After all, someone had been trying to spike its food after all. Not because of me obviously, but someone that looks like Hikigaya Hachiman. Not that I'd actually say it of course, since that would make me more of an idiot than Okuda here.

Seriously, that alien monster was getting visits from a physician just to take care of its laxative problem. Not to mention that it had picked up a brace from somewhere. It was probably duped by one of those home commercial ads, but it meant that its ludicrous speed wasn't as fast any longer. I mean, judging by the fact that it had to lug its brace around and try to keep its melting form together, that puts a damper on its maximum speed.

Killing something that can move at maximum of Mach 15 is easier than something that can move at Mach 20. Not that it gets any easier still, since we can't use anything hypersonic or something like that. Still, lasers should do the trick, right? Mach 15 or 20 or whatever, it shouldn't compare to the universal speed limit. Then again, trying to develop something like that within the year is just asking for the impossible. Research and development takes a long time, in the minimum of years or decades before it gets released to the public. Red tape notwithstanding of course, which could add another few years depending on how the government wants to dig their feet in.

... But then again, the entire world's at stake here. I might ask Karasuba-sensei about this a while later, but I still need to keep watch on my can of coffee. Just in case that wily alien bastard tries to sneak off with it like last time. Granted, it shouldn't know that I liked my coffee with a side of future diabetes, but I would be taking no chances.

"P-Please?"

"T-The doctor said that I really shouldn't..." Oh, that's new. So puppy-dog eyes work on that thing? Does the action produce some kind of mind-altering substance that allows them to be more susceptible to emotional manipulation? Am I spouting technobabble just to look cool in my own head? Yes. Most definitely yes.

"I-I mean, even though it's poison, I added a lot of sugar into it to offset the taste..."

"Sold!"

And so, the idiot snatched the bubbling concoction right out of Okuda's fingers and downed it in one go. Unbelievable. Just... frankly unbelievable. If it wasn't for the fact that we couldn't spike anything with that anti-alien liquid, then this idiot would be dead within the day. Really, if this Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, wily taskmaster of an alien monster couldn't smell the anti-alien coating from a mile away, then this idiot would really be slaughtered in an instant if one could find a way to cripple its speed.

... I was sorely tempted to just start shooting when the alien monster started growing wings from its head. At the very least, I settled for slamming my head on the table in response to this idiotic string of events. A groan escapes my lips when Okuda started asking the alien idiot to keep on testing whatever she had made from a basic chemistry set.

My eyes glanced to the side, seeing my lab partner stare at the concoctions in Okuda's hand with a slight fog of amazement in his eyes. I tried to put a stop to that train of thought, but alas... to no avail.

"Karma, no."

"Karma, yes."

* * *

**AN: I have no excuses.**

**Actually****, scratch that. I have a lot of excuses. Things like enrolling for the sem, getting started with the sem, having assignments for the sem, running around like a headless chicken trying to catch up with the sem, crying in the corner at the negative reviews saying that the original was better when it was obviously not given that I was the author for it and thus had greater perspective of it than most..****.**

**... alongside more minor reasons like a huge case of writer's block. Maybe writing fanfiction is better on mobile? I don't know, but I get a lot more than if I do it on my phone rather than stare at a blue screen... looking at that expansive plain of blank space... a voice in my head telling me that I have to fill it all out...**

**In any case, more fleshing out here at this point. Karma's a little bit hard to write because surprise-surprise, I can't get in the mindset of a budding socio/psychopath. Still, hope that the interaction's good enough to satisfy whatever it is you guys want for the moment. Plus hey, another prospective member of the Hikigaya gang, though more out of impulsive decisions than anything else**.

**So**** leave a fav, follow, or review. Just make sure that I can get some constructive criticism if you guys want to rail on me so I can make some edits.**


	8. Chapter 2-3

**Deadeye**

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Chapter (2.3) - Making Alliances With a Psychopath is Weirdly Expected

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If there was something else that I hated more than idiots, it's how said idiots are utterly incorrigible once they had set up a path for themselves. Not only is this stubbornness disgusting and sentimental, it also allows them to develop tunnel vision that hampers them from seeing the bigger picture. It's as if a single trigger even can suddenly sink their IQ by fifty, and when that point comes... it's too late. The only thing that you can do is damage control. Which is 'difficult', to say the least. After all, this is Karma that we're talking about here. Sociopathic, psychopathic, I-don't-know-what-goes-on-inside-his-head Akabane Karma.

To gain a semblance of control, I let out an aggrieved sigh and massaged my temples. My face slams into my desk, blocking out the rest of the attention that I would be getting. Stay calm. Keep calm. Take a few deep breaths. Besides, they aren't even that close, anyway. Start panicking when one of them sneaks up on you in like... forever.

"We're keeping her, right?"

"She's not a pet. And you're annoying her." I glumly replied back, propping my head up just so Okuda could see my eyes. Now you see what I have to deal with everyday. If it wasn't for the fact that I spent most of said day busy in trying to keep Karma's tendencies at a minimum, then I would've felt a bit ashamed at my... compatriot's, actions. Now however, I just want this to be done. There is only so much that one can take for the day before shutting down. And I was dangerously close to that limit.

"But..."

"You can just ask her if she wants to join you in making some of... whatever it is you're doing." More of those poisons that she had blatantly asked that alien monster to sample, obviously. But I can't just say it out loud in front of the whole class. Besides, Takebayashi was here for once (suspicious as it was), carefully munching down on his lunch while watching an idol show. As if such a banal thing would stop me from noticing how you glanced towards me every time that I did something. It wasn't as if I was going to stab him or something.

That was more Karma's schtick than mine, to be honest. But back on track. Disregard the paranoid otaku, and focus on the psychopath hellbent on roping in an innocent in our... antics, to put things lightly.

"... I'm asking her, though?"

"This and that are different", I reply with an aggrieved sigh, slamming my head onto my desk once more. More than likely, this was just another ploy to toy around with me. Both Karma and I knew that, and we knew that I was getting close to the edge. He _had _to be smart. Just why. If he was anything less than a psychopath that I could twist to my own ends, then I would've dumped him by the sidewalk for being too much of a riajuu for my tastes. "Ask her first _without _my presence."

Indeed. Okuda was already trembling, her knees all but molded together into one amorphous mess as she quickly glanced away from my eyes. To be honest, I almost forgot the effect that these eyes had on other people. Takebayashi didn't mind because he was an otaku. Karasuba-sensei was some kind of top government agent or something. And Karma was just a psychopath, true and true. If any normal person were to look upon these eyes — say, Okuda or someone else — then they would've been intimidated. Nagisa doesn't count. I think. Since he's... _Nagisa_, he isn't just any kind of normal person.

"Ah, right." Karma looked like a lightbulb had turned on in his head. Which was probably for the better, since he dragged Okuda out of the classroom by the hand and left me alone to savor my silence. I leaned back into my seat, arms crossed behind my nape, and basked in the feeling of silence with a smile on my face.

"Dude."

My smile immediately dropped into a scowl, opening my eyes to find Maehara staring at me with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. What's _his _problem? "Did you just...?"

"Yeah. Now leave me alone." Really, just one look at the entire situation and anyone with a working brain would know that I wanted some peace and quiet. Do I really need to say things upfront just so these idiots could understand what I'm trying to say here? I never really had a problem with communicating with Shu... though it might just be because of the fact that we've been... friends? I think? Yeah, friends for two years and counting. "Go bother someone else. Better yet, keep on eating. P.E.'s next, remember?"

I was all but done with my lunch, anyway. Nothing more than a few riceballs and some leftovers from yesterday's dinner to get me through the day. Along with a few cans of coffee that I had stashed in my bookbag, it gave me a little bit more oomph during the afternoon. Was it weird that the class period after lunch was always P.E.? No. After all, physical exertion is the best way to shake a sleepy mind awake. Or so I'd like to think, but I do think that it was more of the fact that it was Karasuba-sense teaching us rather than the alien monster.

Everyone part of the E class loves Karasuba-sensei. It was nothing more than a fact. Not that I didn't appreciate his help, but I didn't admire him with the same starry eyes that everyone had. After all, teaching was a soul-crushing job, no matter where you are. But here, in Kunugigaoka? He'd probably be torn apart within the year, forced to go along with the flow like the rest of the teachers had. All part of the principal's plan, of course, but it didn't help in getting rid of the bitter taste in my mouth. Just another one of the reasons why I wanted the bastard out of his position. Well, that and what he did to Shu was... rage-inducing. I'd rather not think about it.

Back to the topic. Peace and quiet wasn't really on the table any longer when you had a Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, wily taskmaster of an alien monster teaching you everything in Kunugigaoka's standard curriculum. It was the main reason why valued times like these, wherein I can just lay back and spend some time in silence. The idle chatter didn't really annoy me all that well, but had grown fond of it during the short time that had spent in this class. At the very least, it was something that had appreciated more ever since I had brought Karma into the fray. Or officialized our alliance. I don't really know the term to describe such a thing.

Went into a deal? That probably works.

While Karma had toned down his abrasiveness towards others, he seemed to have made it up by making sure to annoy me at all hours of the day. It was probably a part of the deal list in the details, something that I can see written in fine print. An inconvenience to be sure, but one that I must suffer through to keep his side of the deal. It whatever passes for a deal inside his mind.

Still, it didn't mean that I didn't get annoyed at his antics. It simply means that rationalized his actions in a way that made sense in my mind. Karma's still annoying as hell.

Reaching into my pockets and pulling out my earphones, I began listening to my phone's playlist while letting the time pass by. Silence is golden, and I plan on getting the most of it before Karma wrecks my solitude.

* * *

[——]

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I spied upon my target with a hint of trepidation. Karma was beside me, humming upon seeing that alien monster's painfully obvious disguise. Both of us watched at the foreigner all but hanging off the alien monster's tentacle, a shiver running through the bottom of my spine at the sight. Truly despicable. Disgusting. I should add 'molester' to this alien monster's attribute, just so can feel a little bit more at ease.

"You think we should call Karasuba-sensei about this?"

Obviously. I didn't even bother giving Karma a reply as I stood up and began walking towards the faculty room. As per usual, I left the redhead at his spot. Karma seemed interested in watching the fireworks, and wouldn't want to miss it for the world. Lucky him.

"Hm? Hikigaya? This is unexpected." Karasuba-sensei remarked when slid the door open towards the faculty room, glancing a shot at the window just in time to see the alien monster being strung along by that foreigner. "... Ah. So it's about that."

There was a hint of resignation in his voice, meaning that whoever that woman is wasn't classified information. Or at the very least, classified to the class. Nevertheless, I didn't have much to speculate on, which meant that I needed more information. This time however, information that I can actually _ask_ for instead of finding it myself.

How wonderful. To reap the rewards for another's work without doing anything. Truly a wonderful way to live through life. "You know something about that, Karasuba-sensei?"

Our teacher's brow twitched. It seems like was right on the money, then.

"Her name is Irina Jelavich." Karasuba-sensei spoke, turning back towards his laptop. He sounded like he was reading from a script or a resume... which he probably was. "She'll be your English teacher starting today. Officially."

Ah. I see. It wasn't as if the government would just twiddle its thumbs while waiting for a class of fourteen to fifteen year olds to get good enough for assassinating an alien lifeform. Still, I smile while raising a brow. I had to look the part, after all. "And unofficially?"

"She's a hired assassin."

I waited for Karasuba-sensei to elaborate. He seemed to be waiting for a reaction, by the way that he fell silent and turned towards me with a neutral expression. I didn't know what he saw, but he let out a sigh and leaned back against his admittedly comfy-looking chair. His headache must've been as bad as it looked when he started rubbing his temples with an exasperated expression on his face. "You're not even going to say anything about this?"

"I don't really expect the government to place all their eggs into one basket." I replied back, keeping the word 'duh' from being materialized in the depths of my mind. Karasuba-sensei was just a little bit frazzled due to whatever he was doing a while back. I can't imagine sending daily reports to the government being a cushy job. "So yes, I'm not surprised that the government would send in some help. The bounty on that alien monster's head might probably account for the ease in hiring whoever she is."

Needless to say, a chill ran down my spine at the implication that the government was hiring assassins. Luckily, I had my hands shoved into my pockets, so Karasuba-sensei didn't see them trembling. Maybe all of this was just a low-key way to impart that if any one of us were to spread this secret...

"In any case, I advise you to observe her, Hikigaya." Karasuba-sensei replied after a moment of silence, turning back towards his written report. "There are a lot of lessons that you can learn from an assassin like her. Seduction and infiltration, for instance."

"Seduction? _Me_?" Karasuba-sensei winced. Yeah, I didn't like the image that came up in my mind as well. Just another thing to add to my nightmares, then. Although at the very least, infiltration was something that I can get behind. At the very least, it would make plan 'spike-that-alien-monster's-food-with-laxatives' a lot easier. I might even be able to do it outside of class period, if I get good enough.

... In any case, back to the topic. It would seem like this assassin is some sort of honeypot. Seduction and infiltration painted a good picture of this assassin's abilities, but there was one main flaw in the government's plan to assassinate that damnable Komachi-threatening, tulip-ripping, money-grubbing, perverted, wily taskmaster of an alien monster.

"Karasuba-sensei."

"Hm?"

"Are you sure that this assassin would be able to seduce that alien monster without even a single hint on what its preferences are?"

There was silence in the faculty room, only broken by the clacking of keyboard keys. It took a few moments before Karasuba-sensei gave me a reply. Even then, I can still sense the undercurrent of pain in his tone.

"She's the one that took up the job, if you're asking."

"Ah. So she's one of _those_ people, then."

"Hikigaya, get back to your classroom. If you'd been listening earlier, then classes had already started."

We both know that the opening bell hadn't rung yet, however. It was Karasuba-sensei who rang the damn thing, after all. Nevertheless, I bade my farewell and went back towards the classroom, noticing that Karasuba-sensei had also gotten up from his seat. Probably to make sure that I didn't say anything about our new teacher's... _quirks_.

Still, Karma needs to know. That way, I can sit back and watch the fireworks.

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**AN: I have determined that it is much better for me to write this using my phone. However, it also means that the quality might drop due to errors that pop out due to autocorrect. So, I'm going to have to uh, get a beta to make sure that my grammar's up to snuff. Anyone wanna volunteer?**

**In other news, this arc isn't done yet. Karma's introduction in the manga took about one... two chapters, I think? I want to flesh him out more here. Probably sneak in some characters development to and form what would become Hachiman's clique. Not that he even notices, the idiot. Sometimes having a one-track mind isn't all that promising. Uh, that's experience talking.**

**Also****, a little more butterflies this time around. They're subtle ones to be sure, but the fact that they still happen is a glimpse of things to come. Anyone who wants to share their theories can leave a review. And a favorite. And a follow as well.**

Hope** you like the chapter, and see you next time on uh... whenever college isn't grating me a new a-hole. Damnable 7 am classes...**


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